She Bit Me!!!

Jesus is talking to a crowd of Jewish people. They’re perched on stones on the hillside overlooking the Sea of Galilee. He throws out this pearl, you know, divinely summing up the entire sacred writ as they know it. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” A collective sigh of understanding sweeps the global audience, including myself, from this moment forward, as this profound ‘Aha moment’ sinks in. Our actions carry weight. Our behaviors and attitudes come full circle.

 

I was asked to join a ‘cluster’ in town a few months ago. I’ve never experienced anything like it. It’s a highly active group of super citizens who become aware of local issues and work to bring change. In the last few months, the 160-member group found a wheel chair for a crippled boy who was scooting around on his knees, helped four children from one family start school by donating uniforms and school fees, helped a lost child find his mother, helped a special needs child connect to the special needs group in town, helped an abused child get to the hospital and receive counseling, helped a crippled mother with her child’s hospital bills, and advocated on behalf of children being caned in school, oh... and warned everyone of buffalo on the loose!  It’s been an absolute joy to join them! This is the kind of ‘Do unto others…’ I have in mind when I hear the phrase.

But generosity, kindness and love become surreptitiously flipped on their heads when a hurting child does as has been done to them. A precious girl walked into our lives a few weeks ago. She’s seven, but is the size of a five-year-old, and has only attended school intermittently. She’s a survivor.  She’s determined and bold. And she’s scared and lonely. Abandoned at birth she was taken in by somebody who ended up being her nemesis.
 
This. Child. Has. Struggled.
 
 “Auntie Ann, Bee bit everyone in the class and is abusing us (hitting and calling names).”
 
I wanted to say, “Yes. Of course she bit you. That's all she knows. The in-human who was housing her, treated her like garbage. She is deeply scarred in every way from regularly being bitten, beaten with a pipe, and verbally abused.”
Instead, I whispered, “She doesn’t know it’s safe here yet.  Do you remember how scared you felt when you came?  Will you help teach her it’s safe here by being kind, even if she’s not.” They nodded, knowingly.

They have been kind and it's making a difference.
 
Bee is finding her true self living among the adored and is soaking it in. She has good days and bad days but the good days are starting to outnumber the bad. Yesterday, was a good day. I found her helping one of the smaller children clean their lunch plate.  She's trying new attitudes and behaviors and we're so proud of her!